Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Pressing National Matters

This is a brief tangent from my usual posts. There's been a lot of debate recently concerning the rights of Americans and their ability to take their family members off life support, assuming the patient's condition has no chance of improvement. Whether it's a feeding tube or a respirator, these issues need careful discussion, or, as is custom in America, a non-scientific poll in which we will then use to declare a moral victor. So, the question you've all been knocking around in your heads for the last couple of weeks...

Should President Bush's feeding tube be removed?


I leave the floor to you. And, please, let's keep the seriousness to a minimum.*



*Seriously.

62 Comments:

At 12:39 AM, Blogger phucker said...

Is that the tube which he uses to make 'nuculear' bombs using parts ordered over the 'Internets'?

 
At 12:42 AM, Blogger I'm smarter than you said...

marky mark needs his feeding tube removed

www.ChrisIsOmniscient.blogspot.com

 
At 1:27 AM, Blogger okstatendn said...

Feeding tube removal is only warranted when the patient exhibits the Schiavo overbite. The Bush stare, while a convincing indicator of a PSV, is completely different.

 
At 2:16 AM, Blogger Nobody said...

Yes. We need to keel him over now.

P.S. You have a new loyal reader.

 
At 2:17 AM, Blogger The Cure said...

You could try but I am pretty sure he would pass a law banning it. Then the next day he would turn around and pass a law to remove Hilary's feeding tube.

I hate politicians, this thing is just futher proof that they are a bunch of corrupt bastards. What happen to a real leader?

 
At 2:32 AM, Blogger angel said...

hi there! ! how are you? i find you intersting

 
At 2:57 AM, Blogger Dave said...

Don't you mean President Cheney? Isn't he a robot? How does Robot President Cheney eat anyways?

 
At 3:00 AM, Blogger Sarah said...

Yes, because Bush is really God and he can only prevent Loki and Bartleby from entering Heaven if we remove that which facilitates his artificial life [please tell me you've seen "Dogma"].

 
At 3:10 AM, Blogger Former Intern Andy said...

I've seen Dogma.

Even if I hadn't, my reply would have been the same.

 
At 3:15 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bush has a feeding tube? Oh my dark lord Satan! If I knew that I wouldn't have voted for him!

 
At 6:43 AM, Blogger Rohit said...

His feeding tube as well as his breeding tube should be removed...

 
At 8:06 AM, Blogger Mike said...

He could use a brain tube!

 
At 8:10 AM, Blogger 123-I-Love-You said...

No, it shouldn't be removed. Presidential feeding tubes can provide excellent entertainment.

After all, we all remember what Clinton did with his "feeding tube" during the Lewinsky fiasco.

 
At 8:47 AM, Blogger Patience said...

REMOVE IT!

 
At 8:56 AM, Blogger Luke said...

I don't think the tube should be removed...

More-so that it should be plugged in elsewhere, somewhere where the sun doesn't shine perhaps...

 
At 10:16 AM, Blogger scribe called steff said...

Bush needs to be put into a dark, dark hole surrounded by mujahadeen who want to flog his skinny Texan ass relentlessly.

The White House should demand an IQ prerequisite from its leaders, even when they're token pretty boy leaders standing in for a dried-out old hack like Cheney.

At least give the bastard a spelling test.

[Besides, Bush's tube probably courses with Wild Turkey, judging by some of the stupid crap he says in public.]

Thank God I'm a Canadian.

 
At 10:26 AM, Blogger Kim said...

If you remove it, how else will he eat his pretzels?

 
At 10:27 AM, Blogger Grafs said...

For three EZ payments of 3.99, you can have the peace of mind of keeping the republicans out of your life! The new and improved "advanced directive" is all that stands between you and nosy congresspersons. As for Bush's feeding tube i say "remove that sucker...twice!

 
At 11:12 AM, Blogger Monty said...

Feeding tube, nothin'... we should remove the umbilical cord connecting W to his father's political agenda.

 
At 11:24 AM, Blogger Mimi in NY said...

The star-SPAAAAAAaaangled ba-nner...

I'm shocked Andy. Really. We should be preserving Bush as a rare specimen who has single-handedly managed to disprove the Darwinian theory of Natural Selection. The man's a living legend. I for one will rue the day when this noble creature passes on.

 
At 11:49 AM, Blogger Jammerz said...

Really, I think it's easier to just take away his gameboy and force him to actually pay attention during meetings, and he'd probably just keel over. It's a lot less messy.

 
At 12:22 PM, Blogger Becky said...

I don't think his feeding tube can come out fast enough. Unfortunately, he would probably have to come back from 'vacationing at the ranch' (aka: snorting coke off of his wife's paperwork acquitting her of manslaughter in the back room of the White House)... and it would interfere with his book learnin'.

http://becksbloglog.blogspot.com/

 
At 12:23 PM, Blogger P.A. said...

okay, so you had already become one of my favorite blogs to read but really this post takes the cake, and the ice cream and the whipped cream cherry and nuts.
Lets have a nationwide referendum to remove GW's life support.
I mean what would he do without daddy dick, mommy condi etc...
I mean, he would have at least choked on that pretzel right?

 
At 2:41 PM, Blogger Melissa said...

I doubt that would even work. For some reason, I think removing his tube would only make him meaner and harder to get rid of.

 
At 2:43 PM, Blogger Melissa said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 2:44 PM, Blogger Melissa said...

Oh, I forgot to mention that his lack of dying after we removed his tube would only strengthen the red staters and raise Mr. Bush's status and title to "second-coming of the Messiah". I think this should be avoided at all costs.

 
At 2:53 PM, Blogger Internet Street Philosopher said...

Naw, we just need to do some brain surgery on him....maybe has a tumor that's affecting his judgment.

 
At 3:52 PM, Blogger Shavonne said...

Wow! Is that all it would take to get Bush out of the White House?

The few, the proud, the 48 percent!

 
At 4:32 PM, Blogger James said...

He sure looks like a vegetable to me.

 
At 4:53 PM, Anonymous Filipa said...

Why kill him,when you can choose NOT to vote for him? After all,it is he's second "round",somebody had to vote for him.That's the beauty of democracy :) I've read your post about NY terrorism alert(Well,@ least you didnt have to walk barefoot while boarding @ frankfurt to my NY flight,because your high heels where in metal,and a potencial weapon on board therefore retained...)and safety(the one you got shot)and it's quite a surprise. I've been recently to NY,and excepted it to be more dangerous,never once heard a shot.I'm from a small seaside city,in Portugal(next to Spain).And for me to state that NY is safe,no extra caution than the usual when travelling,believe me,I felt pretty safe.Where I live you can even leave your front door open.I stayed in NY about a month,than moved to Princeton to attend classes.Now that's a peaceful sight!Too much if you ask me.I was wondering if you could help me.My boyfriend is ending his internship here in Porto,graduated med university with the highest grade in his year,but he missed the exam(he's brother passed away) to access 'speciality course'( he's heading for plastic surgery).And he can only repeat this exam,next year.The thing is,in order to achieve some knowledge instead of taking the year off,we have in mind some internships "pro bono". Any hospital in Portugal will take him,however he is looking for further perspectives. You know the educational system in the USA,how do you think it's the best aproach? Send his CV directly to the Hospital Admn? Contact a med university? It would only be about 6 months,he already has a proposal in London. Please do contact me: Filipa_v@hotmail.com. Regarding the subject of your post,you should see "Mar Adentro",it's a spanish movie about euthanasia,it won the oscar for best foreign film this year. Once again,looking forward for you reply,and very grateful for your help. Filipa and Mario

 
At 4:54 PM, Blogger Vintage said...

Why kill him,when you can choose NOT to vote for him? After all,it is he's second "round",somebody had to vote for him.That's the beauty of democracy :) I've read your post about NY terrorism alert(Well,@ least you didnt have to walk barefoot while boarding @ frankfurt to my NY flight,because your high heels where in metal,and a potencial weapon on board therefore retained...)and safety(the one you got shot)and it's quite a surprise. I've been recently to NY,and excepted it to be more dangerous,never once heard a shot.I'm from a small seaside city,in Portugal(next to Spain).And for me to state that NY is safe,no extra caution than the usual when travelling,believe me,I felt pretty safe.Where I live you can even leave your front door open.I stayed in NY about a month,than moved to Princeton to attend classes.Now that's a peaceful sight!Too much if you ask me.I was wondering if you could help me.My boyfriend is ending his internship here in Porto,graduated med university with the highest grade in his year,but he missed the exam(he's brother passed away) to access 'speciality course'( he's heading for plastic surgery).And he can only repeat this exam,next year.The thing is,in order to achieve some knowledge instead of taking the year off,we have in mind some internships "pro bono". Any hospital in Portugal will take him,however he is looking for further perspectives. You know the educational system in the USA,how do you think it's the best aproach? Send his CV directly to the Hospital Admn? Contact a med university? It would only be about 6 months,he already has a proposal in London. Please do contact me: Filipa_v@hotmail.com. Regarding the subject of your post,you should see "Mar Adentro",it's a spanish movie about euthanasia,it won the oscar for best foreign film this year. Once again,looking forward for you reply,and very grateful for your help. Filipa and Mario

 
At 4:55 PM, Blogger yourmom said...

Hey Andy! Nice Blog. I am in intern in the Tennessee Legislature. Check out what one of our State Representatives is doing....
P.S. he's an idiot

www.lastcar.blogspot.com
This is Rep. Campfield's blog

 
At 4:56 PM, Anonymous Ana said...

Why kill him,when you can choose NOT to vote for him? After all,it is he's second "round",somebody had to vote for him.That's the beauty of democracy :) I've read your post about NY terrorism alert(Well,@ least you didnt have to walk barefoot while boarding @ frankfurt to my NY flight,because your high heels where in metal,and a potencial weapon on board therefore retained...)and safety(the one you got shot)and it's quite a surprise. I've been recently to NY,and excepted it to be more dangerous,never once heard a shot.I'm from a small seaside city,in Portugal(next to Spain).And for me to state that NY is safe,no extra caution than the usual when travelling,believe me,I felt pretty safe.Where I live you can even leave your front door open.I stayed in NY about a month,than moved to Princeton to attend classes.Now that's a peaceful sight!Too much if you ask me.I was wondering if you could help me.My boyfriend is ending his internship here in Porto,graduated med university with the highest grade in his year,but he missed the exam(he's brother passed away) to access 'speciality course'( he's heading for plastic surgery).And he can only repeat this exam,next year.The thing is,in order to achieve some knowledge instead of taking the year off,we have in mind some internships "pro bono". Any hospital in Portugal will take him,however he is looking for further perspectives. You know the educational system in the USA,how do you think it's the best aproach? Send his CV directly to the Hospital Admn? Contact a med university? It would only be about 6 months,he already has a proposal in London. Please do contact me: Filipa_v@hotmail.com. Regarding the subject of your post,you should see "Mar Adentro",it's a spanish movie about euthanasia,it won the oscar for best foreign film this year. Once again,looking forward for you reply,and very grateful for your help. Filipa and Mario

 
At 7:07 PM, Blogger Sarah said...

Loki threw down his fiery sword before the throne of God and then he gave God the finger. Ha ha ha.

 
At 7:20 PM, Blogger Jammerz said...

It's really kind of embarrassing to have a president that choked on a pretzel. Who the hell chokes on pretzels? Grapes, yes. Hot dogs yes. Carrots? Yeah. Buttons? Yep. But Pretzels??? You have to be a real tool to choke on a pretzel.Unless of course you are under the age of 10. If you are under the age of 10 it's okay to choke on a pretzel, if you are over the age of 10 and choking on pretzels you are a tool.

 
At 7:23 PM, Blogger I, Gladiator said...

Oh! No! His tube hasn't ALREADY been removed??? I thought for sure that it had been considering his record of decision making. Oh dear. Now we're really in trouble.

I hope I bump into you on the subway. You make me laugh.

 
At 7:31 PM, Blogger upline said...

Emergency Blog about Dr. Nemeh healing in Spirit at Cleveland, Ohio Churches

He's just a man, a man that has surrendered to spirit and healing in the name of Jesus. He as been doing so for many years. Reports of healings started to emerge and a demand for his attention. He held healing mass sessions and more reports. The lame walking,blind seeing, tumors disappearing,arms that could move, moving. I had my moment and experience with Dr. Nemeh early Palm Sunday 2:30 AM at a Westlake, Ohio Church.

I was lucky enough to get in this time. I had tried the Sunday before at St. Peter and Paul in Garfield Hts, Ohio. Ten thousand people showed up with helicopters overhead and the media on the front steps of the church. The Bishop even turned out an gave mass in the activity center. The service went on till midnight. The Dr and his wife both cried when they had to turn away 7000 people after seeing 3500.

They didn't give up they met the next night till 6 AM and then Dr. Nemeh went to work at his medical practice. Again Saturday night they met with people wanting to have a touch by this incredibly compassionate man. More turn out than had tickets but they would not turn anyone away. Ambulences waited in the parking lot with sick people in need.

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The emotions were high and we all cried as he came close. After waiting hours and getting to know the people around you and their stories we all cried in joy that each other were being touched and a hope and faith in the healing to come.

A young daughter brought her wheelchair bound mother. She stood 8 hours next to her mothers chair. Her mother in the chair and hardly able to function since 1998. She patted, and kissed her mother repeatedly during the wait. When Dr. Nemeh stood in front of the mother and worked on her the daughter stooped by her chair and sobbed hard in joy that her mother might receive a healing from Jesus. Dr. Nemeh reached down and had her stand and also worked on the daughter.

I was in tears and overcome with emotions from all this. He made the sign of the cross on my forehead. I felt like I was falling backward quickly. I didn't know if I was or it was just a sensation. He touched my chest and it felt like a vortex of heat spinning and penetrating intentionally and with definate purpose deep inside me.

I am an energy therapist myself and I have felt healing energy but never like this it was instant and direct and from a place I had never experienced before. He turn to a friend that was with me and put his hands directly on her ears. She was deaf in one ear. Seeing this I was overcome again. He knew, the spirit of Jesus guided him instantly to the exact places that the people needed healing. I was a witness and understoon what the term witness was now.

I thought about all this and came home knowing I was "touched" by Jesus. I felt Jesus energy and spirit. I believe in God and Jesus and all wonderful spiritual things but I'm not a holy roller as my father used to say, just a person that believes in a higher power and design.

I was given a divine gift of understanding and I would like to share this experience direct with others.
Dr. Issam Nemeh, his website is
www.drnemeh.com if you put his name in a search engine you get many testimonials even from doctors and media people that have went to him and were healed. Awesome for sure.
Witness
Cindy Lee
www.peacelovehope.com
www.promote-me.net
www.uplinegames.com
March 23,2005

 
At 7:36 PM, Blogger upline said...

Feeding Tube,

No one beats death and lives forever. We all die sometime and usually not a minute before God wants us to die.

Even with medial help and intervention, People die. Why? most likely it was their time.

The daughter with the feeding tube. I say daughter because she will always be her mother and fathers daughter. The husband is no longer her husband he has a new wife and two children.

He's not her husband now but she is someones daughter that brought her into this world.

If you stopped feeding your daughter now no food or water, anyone's daughter would die.

this is not God's will it is inhuman treatment of a living person. Why can't the former husband just do his life with his new family and leave her to be cared for by her mother and father.

Why should he have the right to determine this now?

Leave HER alone and in God's time with water and food she will die in her own time.

My thoughts 4 sure.

Cindy Lee

 
At 7:45 PM, Blogger Former Intern Andy said...

That's great.

Since I asked for little or no seriousness in this post, I reserve the right to read everyone's comments as if they were being spoken sarcastically. Makes it funnier.

But that's just me. I need help.

 
At 8:23 PM, Blogger winz said...

Hey seriously... I don't understand why everyone's so against Bush... To me, he's the best president ever....


NOT.

Just remove the freakin' thing already.

 
At 9:35 PM, Blogger Menuhin said...

Don't remove the feeding tube but instead tie the other end to a rocket headed towards the sun.

http://thisbloghaschlamydia.blogspot.com , my blog if you want to take a look. However, compared to this one it deserves to have its feeding tube tied to a rocket headed towards the sun.

 
At 9:44 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

remove the tube and stuph it up his ***
maybe then his brain will work better

 
At 11:26 PM, Blogger veronica said...

aaah.... that explains a lot.

I knew the puppet master was behind all this...

So Bush is a woman in Florida! Got it.

Andy, you make me laugh.

 
At 1:35 AM, Anonymous Me said...

Who took my tube? Him name is hopkin green tube. You took my tube. I will find my tube.

www.american-me.blogspot.com

 
At 12:36 PM, Blogger Lia said...

I heard today that Jeb Bush is trying to get Terri Schiavo made a ward of the state.

Just a fact to consider in this discussion.

 
At 3:50 PM, Anonymous IMPEACH BUSH said...

Yes, yes we should. What a bloody brilliant idea.

 
At 3:52 PM, Anonymous IMPEACH BUSH said...

YES, yes we should! What a bloody brilliant idea.

 
At 4:10 PM, Blogger dusty said...

HELL YES WE SHOULD REMOVE IT..and cornhole the jackass shortly thereafter..just a thought..

 
At 10:25 PM, Blogger A Poor White Man said...

After reading a review of President Bush’s latest medical evaluation, I must disagree with most of the comments posted so far. The President’s own medical team clearly disagrees with 48% of America’s voters, and vehemently disputes their claim that the Commander-in-Chief suffers from PVS.

In their affidavit, his physicians stated that President Bush showed several behaviors "that they believe cast a reasonable doubt on the prior diagnosis" of a persistent vegetative state. For example, George’s face brightens and he smiles in response to the voice of familiar people such as Dick Cheney or Satan. His eyes don't track moving objects consistently, but "he does fixate his gaze on colorful objects or human faces for some 15 seconds at a time.”

Although the President did not demonstrate during their 90-minute visit compelling evidence of verbalization, conscious awareness or volitional behavior, we believe he seems at some level to be aware of some things around him.”

Besides, by pulling George’s feeding tube wouldn’t you also seal Jeb’s fate as well? I mean they are a double act.

 
At 3:15 PM, Blogger Irfan said...

Procedure to remove feeding tube:

Step 1: Hire Specialist Feeding tube Remover. Recommend using Haggling Skill #256 to finalise price.

Haggling Skill #256
When you want to end your haggling session and accept the given offer, yell "Deal!," grabbing the person's hand almost violently and then shaking it.

Step 2: Make sure you distract any nearby policemen using the old "suspicous bag" ruse.

Step 3: Post a google ad relating to "Angry Fetus" so that any surveillance operators are distracted from watching their cameras.

Step 4: Prepare to order Mcdonald's Happy Meal and wait for news from your Specialist Feeding tube Remover. (Hey this maybe your lucky day)

Step 5a[Backup]: Arrange a meeting with President Bush and convince him to take the Subway to work so that he will succumb to Scientology and we may finally be free after a thousand years.

Step 5b[Backup]: Apply for a Bachelor's degree in Physics at the University of Physics in Physicsville; thereafter do a Master's in Physics, then a Phd, and after that dedicate your life to inventing a time machine. Invent the time machine after like 20 years of research. Go back in time, get Simon. Bring him to this time. Tell him your troubles, and watch him make ass grass!

PS: As you may have noticed, the backups take some time.

 
At 2:37 AM, Blogger charon said...

Feeding tube is fine, just remove the other end from his own arse.

 
At 3:32 PM, Blogger B Rye said...

Remove his feeding tube?.... hell yeah!... but I don’t think it will do much good, I’m sure if we removed his feeding tube he would not hesitate to steal another feeding tube from a baby.

 
At 7:55 PM, Blogger K'ahn said...

Beautiful.. lol! You guys made me laugh!
Too bad Cindy Lee seems to have a different idea about what not being serious Is all about!!
Go back to school and demand your cash back, they robbed you!! Lol!!

 
At 8:46 PM, Blogger lovelygreensweater said...

Remove it? Nooooooooo! Inject ut with bleach. That my friends, is the key.

 
At 2:06 AM, Blogger Fletch said...

You can't kill bush, even as much as everyone wants to...It's like Elvis- a new bush keeps coming back. But I do think that people in a FUBAR state like that should be allowed to die for two reasons. 1 To keep their dignity
2 For family's peace of mind

But anyways, You got a great blog keep it up and check out my blog and give me your ideas
mooseballs2.blogspot.com

 
At 1:13 PM, Blogger Johnny Utah said...

Terri`s interests are not even a concern anymore, shes been hijacked by the very religious right, for thier own agenda, Terri is nothing more then a Pawn, in Political Football, Its beyond sad.

 
At 2:00 AM, Blogger digital_devil said...

you can drop bush feeding tube in Iraq so that he can stop eating food
and start drinking oil . and look for weapons of mass destruction.

if he wants to search for them he should look near his home.

if a person is sick and has no chance its best to let go.

than to continue his or her pain.

for our own emotional needs.

 
At 10:38 AM, Blogger dana said...

OMG, WTF? Bush is, like, the ULTIMATE prez ever! We need to change the laws back so that he can be prez for as many terms as he wants! Now THAT'D be great. He's ruling this place with justice and wisdom. BUSH 4 EVA.


In all seriousness... Pulling it or doing something more insidious with it would be better for this country (wait a minute, is Cheney any better? Something would have to be done about him too...) but think about it... it would make him a martyr and all the right wing Super Christians would try to Saint him... even though the Pope doesn't seem to care for his policies... but the Pope isn't looking so hot these days either...

oh, dear. I believe I will offend some people with this. damn.

 
At 2:24 PM, Anonymous Chino said...

Please do NOT remove Mr. Bush's feeding tube. I like it there so because it's sounds funny when he tries to talk.

 
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At 1:07 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Middle Ages hit the intern community hard. It was a confusing time. Feudalism was bra common practice and lands changed hands often. Servants of one master could quickly become the servants of another. Interns underwear were without stability. The entire intern community lacked motivation. Because, why try to move ahead in the feudal career world of one lord when that lord's head schiesser could very well be on top of a pike by the end of week.

 

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